Intelligence and Wisdom

Intelligence can be evaluated by well-designed exams, but wisdom is an abstract concept hard to explain. As my understanding, intelligence is the brainpower to understand specific knowledge, to learn new skills and to reason and analyze; wisdom is the insightful perception of people and the world, the willpower to handle change and stress, and the ability to make right decision at right time.

Intelligence and wisdom are codependent and intertwined. With enough intelligence, people can develop wisdom from accumulated experience; with enough wisdom, people can tap the full potential of their intelligence. Intelligence can help people to achieve highly in a particular area. Nevertheless, if you want to be successful in every realm of your life, you need wisdom to make right choice and balance your life. It is a blessing for a person to have both top intelligence and top wisdom. If I have to choose one, I think wisdom is better than intelligence.

I ever witnessed several very intelligent persons had miserable life and brought trouble to people around them. As an intelligent person has a sad ending, it looks more tragic than a brainless one does. What kind of life a person can have is determined by his attitude, philosophy and wisdom. A self-centered and narrow-minded person has trouble to understand the others’ feeling and is unable to get along well with people around him.

I was ever a self-absorbed person unable to handle stress. Under stressful situation, I couldn’t concentrate and couldn’t do anything well. When I was frustrated, my husband said to me, “Don’t worry, no one is faultless. Just use your strength more and develop your weakness.” His kind and supportive words relieved my anxiety.

When I was bothered by people’s gossips, my husband told me, “Do you know why some people are jealousy or mean? They are unhappy, unloved or insecure. Can’t you forgive them? When you forgive and let go, you will feel happy.” Therefore, I released myself from outside words.

I have a stress-free home, in which I can feast myself with good food, beautiful music, and edifying books, and I can have a comfortable beauty sleep to reenergize my body and brain cells. I think my husband is wise, He said, “Sure. At least I did a very wise thing, that is, I married you.” The ability to feel appreciation and gratitude is wisdom, too.

It is good to be intelligent; it is better to be wise. If you can not be wise enough, at least have a wise person around you who can help you build up right attitude and guide you to the right path of life.

The Way of Learning

There are three kinds of men, ones that learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.

-Will Rogers

 

I think Will Rogers left out one kind of men, who learn by listening. Most people learn by listening to the school teachers, to their parents, to the social educators and to the mass media. In school, listening is a prime source of information. Listen well and take notes thoroughly, you will have better chance to get a good grade.

 

As a visual person, I am a slow learner by listening. My mind is more focused when I am reading than when I am listening. I learn new skills fast by reading and practicing, so I spend a lot of time reading. Reading presents me a lot of mentors and friends I never meet and provides me a new platform of learning and growth.

 

I also learn through observation. Observing the other people and analyzing why they succeed or why they fail, we can save our time to find the right path to a successful life and avoid getting into a wrong way. Most People learn things by listening, reading and observing. 

 

Some people pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves. Don’t do that, it is dangerous. I heard that a man really peed on bare electric wire unintentionally in a freezing winter; he was shocked to death immediately. Don’t learn things in a hard way, the result can be disastrous or fatal. But if the disaster doesn’t kill you, it may break you down then build you up to a new person with a different mindset.

The Way - Chapter 58 (By Lao Tzu)

When the policy is plain, people are contented and chaste.

When the policy is strict, people are destitute and sullied.

Misfortune can gestate fortune; fortune can evolve into misfortune.

Who knows the evolvement law? There is no predefined rule.

The integrity can be strange; the charitableness can be foul.

The puzzlement of people exists for a long time.

Therefore, the saint should be upright not isolated,  plain not crude, straightforward not hurtful, and shining not glaring.

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Image created by Jade Meng. The background image source: http://www.laozi.net/bba/

Synchronicity

Many things happen at the same time, as if there exists underlying order of universe. Swiss psychologist Carl Jung coined a word “Synchronicity” to describe the coincident occurrences without apparent causal connection, but where there exists meaningful relationship between them.

A common example is like this: "You walk into a book store not knowing what to buy, and the book you need falls from a shelf and practically hits you over the head. "

I checked the example list and feel I may have experienced synchronicity, such as,

• When financial difficulties seemed to have no end, yet there was always enough money for basic expenses...rent, food, utilities.
  
• I felt depressed and couldn't find focus in my life and I met a person who plays a role like a panacea to solve all my psychological, spiritual, social, financial and career problems, as God sends him to me.
  
• I had a sudden relocation which seemed to be for one reason, and I found much more than I hoped for. It works as a miracle.

When we stand back and look, we can see how flow, through synchronicity after synchronicity, has led us down certain paths to our calling. The Power of Flow, p. 39

I may be superstitious for the event below:

On a special day, I forgot to wear my amulet – a scarlet jade bracelet. I drove on a busy city road worrying about not wearing the bracelet, then I rushed a signal and caused a major accident at an intersection. My vehicle was totaled, luckily, I was not hurt at all. After all the hassle, I returned home, turned on my computer and opened my email box, and from a group email I knew that a professor, thousand miles away, who ever taught me, passed away at the same day. I hadn’t seen him nor contacted him since I left school. I have a strange feeling it means something - we impacted each other's path of life in a certain way. I hope he rests peacefully in the otherworld.

Many people believe such events purposely make a person take a more careful look at his or her life: trust your intuition and believe in coincidence.

Noble from Heart

When you are deprived, you don’t abandon and degrade yourself; when you are affluent, you don’t go haughty and excessive; when you face menace, you don’t yield to abused power, thus you can be called a noble person.

 

A person is noble because of his heart. A penniless person with a noble heart can think he is priceless and has the strength to belittle a person who owns millions but got the wealth from foul means. Because a noble heart will attract positive energy, a noble person will survive and thrive again, but a person who obtained his status and wealth in a wrong way is building a weapon to destroy himself sooner or later.

 

Money cannot make a person noble. For a sinful person, money works as a magnifier to let people see clearly his base desire and unseemly behaviors. Without decent life habits, family traditions and refined culture, people can not be called noble however much money they own.

 

A noble person has habits of grace, kindliness, gentleness and self-reliance. Beautiful thoughts and noble actions flow naturally from a noble heart. When a noble person is constrained, he focus on improving himself; when he is prosperous and powerful, he reaches out to as many people as he can.

Believe

I ever watched the popular Shamu show “Believe” in Seaworld Orlando. In the show, the trainers swim with shamus, kiss them, play with them and ride on them. The trainers perform difficult flips and dives with the support of shamus. A group of shamus jump out of water with similar beautiful curve simultaneously. About 5,000 audiences applaud and acclaim for the unforgettable performance.

 

In the show you see a boy whose dream is to be a trainer with killer whales. He believes he can do it, and his dream comes true. Yes, every miracle begins with “believe”. The trainers believe killer whales can be trained; the trainers believe they can do it; the trainers believe the killer shamus will not hurt them. Because of “believe”, the audience can enjoy such a fantastic show.

 

“If you believe and put your heart and mind to it, you can do it!” We have to believe ourselves. Only if we believe we can do it, we can do it. Self-confidence is contagious. It will give us positive attitude and infect everything we do in a positive way. Confidence spreads with successes. When we encounter obstacles and adversities, “believe” can help us sustain in the path, overcome the difficulty and enjoy the sweetness of success finally.

 

“Believe” is powerful. When I doubted my ability and I thought I could not do anything well, my husband showed strong belief in me. His belief instilled confidence into me. From that point, I find I can do a lot of things very well.

 

“Believe”, a simple but miraculous word, is the starting point of any achievement.

Self-Cultivation

The sage Mengzi wrote a famous article 2,300 years ago. His wise words have encouraged a lot of people to face the adversity intrepidly.

“If a person is predestined to take on a great mission and play a role in the history, he has to endure a process of hard tempering, which exercises his mind by suffering, toughens his sinew and bone by toiling, and subjects him to extreme poverty, and tortures him near to crazy. By this means, he will cultivate himself inner strength, build unusual wisdom, and increase his capability.”

So, we should thank those people who gave us a hard time. They provide a playground for us to reflect us, to practice endurance and patience, to cultivate virtues, and to develop a strong nerve.

I ever met a very unreasonable girl, who made up dirty details and spread evil words about me. I didn’t know it until several people asked me to find a lawyer for myself. I was so hurt and argued with her. The result was that I looked as dirty and as bad as her. I learned from it, if we ignore slanderer, the slander will go back to the slanderer. A girl who ever slandered me got a reputation as evil liar.

But I still have to thank her; she exercised my mind, patience and personality. No one can make me angry anymore. I can keep calm and peaceful with any difficult people. I enjoy a good family life and am adored by my husband and parents-in-law. Thank God send us a difficult person or even an evil one to test us, practice us and prepare us for a better life and a big mission.

If people can hurt us, our self-cultivation is not enough. No one can hurt us without our permission.

The Grace of Appreciation

Given a little sunshine, a bud in the shadow will come out; with a gust of wind, a small hand can make a kite fly. Have you met someone who understand you, appreciate you and trust you? Have you met someone who use kindness and belief to rekindle the fire in your heart?

 

At some point of our life, we need someone to encourage us, to reassure us, to help us rebuild our confidence. It doesn’t take a big person to do that. When Dale Carnegie was nine years old, his father remarried. Dale’s father introduced Dale to his stepmother, “Be careful of him. He is the worst boy in the county. He may throw a stone to you or do other bad things beyond your imagination.”

 

Out of Dale’s expectation, his stepmother walked to him, held his head, looked at his eyes, smiled, “You are wrong. He is not the worst boy in the county, but the smartest. He is the boy who hasn’t found where to use his passion.” Dale burst into tears.

 

Because of this word, Dale Carnegie built a beautiful relationship with his stepmother; because of this word, Dale Carnegie was motivated to be good and successful; because of this word, Dale Carnegie helped the other people step onto the path of success.

 

It is a grace to meet someone who appreciates you. You should cherish that person who believes in you even before you believe in yourself.

Quotes about Truth and Lie

Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it's not going to go away.

-Elvis Presley

 

Truth is what stands the test of experience.

 -Albert Einstein

 

You're putting words in my mouth, just the way you put artificial facts in your head!

-David Letterman

 

The man who fears no truth has nothing to fear from lies.

-Thomas Jefferson

 

A lie does not consist in the indirect position of words, but in the desire and intention, by false speaking, to deceive and injure your neighbor.

- Jonathan Swift

 

False words are not only evil in themselves, but they infect the soul with evil.

-Socrates

 

The slander of some people is as great a recommendation as the praise of others.

-Henry Fielding

 

Liars when they speak the truth are not believed.

-Aristotle

 

For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile (1 Peter 3:10).

-Bible

 

The evils of the body are, murder, theft, and adultery; of the tongue, lying, slander, abuse, and idle talk; of the mind, covetousness, hatred, and error.

-Buddha

Four Important Lessons I Ever Learned

Do you want to live an accomplished life? Do you think you have talents but you can not make your talents into use? I did. I ever lived a purposeless life and worked ineffectively, until I learned four important lessons:

 

1. Be self-disciplined. My mother is a much disciplined person. She got up at about 5 a.m. every morning and started to bustle about housework and home business.  She sacrificed a lot for our family. However I didn’t inherit or learn the good habit from her. I learned the lesson from my husband. My husband gets up at 5:30 a.m. every workday and prepares breakfast, and then he wakes me up. He goes to gym at least four times per week, so he is always happy and energized. He does a lot of things as a routine.
   
   
2. Be organized. My husband has a good filing system and he clearly knows what is where and what time to do what. I learned this habit from him. After I put everything in order, it takes me little time to find documents and information I need. When I am organized and have a clear roadmap for a task, I can work several times more efficiently.
   
   
3. Pay attention. I ever was absent-minded person, until my husband told me, “You have to pay attention. You know, some highly educated people make stupid mistakes in their life or fail at their career, not because of their intelligence, but because they don’t pay attention.” I began to pay attention to things I involved. When I put my heart and mind into life, it is miraculous that I can selectively learn something new from people, books, radio, TV, internet at any moment at all circumstances.
   
   
4. Be alert. Once when I was driving, my husband said to me, “Be alert. When you are at the driver’s seat, behave like a driver. When you are there, be there. The secret of most successful people is that they have focus. After they lose their focus, they can not reach their best performance any more.” Be alert, focus things you are doing. Focus on the most important thing, ignore all the distractions. When you are working, only think about work. When you are at home, never think about work. When you are traveling, focus on the local people, scenery and culture. When you are there, be there.

Be self-disciplined, be organized, pay attention and be alert, follow sound philosophy, take action, move forward step by step, you can accomplish something eventually.

 

All in all, however talented you are, whatever a big dream you have, if you are unable to focus, to start from little, to make progress everyday, you can not achieve much.